happy 5th birthday blogie

photo credit

I know I'm a little late in posting... actually, I've been lost lately.
Much (an not much) has happened in this past year. But I can sum it all with this one verse:

After these things the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, saying, “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward.” Genesis 15:1

 God led me to do the unexpected. Out of my very mouth unimaginable words poured forth, "I'm stepping down." Say What?!?! Who... Me...  Yes! And there I sat, in tears, knowing that these very words were not spoken by my will but by God's very Spirit.

You see, I'm not an educated person like most of my peers. I didn't go to college. I have no degree, or even an AA. And though I had no title to define me, I was defined by service and ministries.

In a very inconspicuous way, these works were idols in my life. I was going to church to serve, and without notice my attendance for God alone was less and less. Don't get me wrong, I didn't drift from God. On the contrary, my service was for Him. But I was all works and neglectful of my own heart. The words of Jesus echo loudly to me concerning Mary, "But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her." Luke 10:42.

The next day I sat in my car crying. I doubted that God had spoken through me. I was afraid that this decision was the wrong one. I feared that this decision would affect my youth girls and the various ministries I was involved in. Worst of all, was I trusting God or cowardly running? I wept bitterly. At that moment I knew I needed to hear from God. I read from Jack Hayford's YouVersion Plan, Praise In The Presence of God:

God Is Our Reward
God never demands a sacrifice for the divine pleasure of smelling its aroma or because He needs us to tickle His pride. The objective is our release—our growth.

God asked Abraham to offer Isaac. Not to exploit Abraham’s emotions or to destroy Isaac, but to take away forever Abraham’s fear that God might not have his best interest at heart. Only in worship do we draw close enough to discern God’s true nature and loving heart.

God gave Abraham no immediate monetary reward for worshiping Him, but the reward was immensely grander—God Himself! (Jack Hayford)

After these things the word of the Lord came unto Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram: I am thy shield, and thy exceeding great reward. Genesis 15:1

God was asking me that very moment to willingly offer my works. Not to exploit my emotions or to destroy these ministries but to take away forever my fear that God might not have His best interest at heart. It was in fact through this act of worship that I have been able to draw close enough to discern God's nature and loving heart. He has been my shield these past few months, my exceedingly great reward.

The sacrifice was more than just stepping down from serving at church. It meant seeking a place of refuge where He would restore, revive, and renew me. Even I can recognize that old habits don't die so easily. I prayed for God's guidance and He provided such a place. Remember, God's objective through our sacrifice is our growth. And I have been growing. That is something beautiful that can not be taken from me.

I can't put to words all that He has been revealing to me, or even what He is stirring in my heart. But I can tell you this, He is making me new. 

I have been lost with reason. I've been enjoying my reward, God himself.

Anywho, now that I have brought you up to date...CHEERS to the fifth year!

Birthday Surprise! It's Nicole. part 3

Happy Friday Lovely! Today we read part three of Nicki's . And boy is it a treasure! As I read it last night, I was lost in a sea of tears. My heart and spirit connected with her words and I will never be the same. I am confident that her testimonies have, in a special way, reached your heart and drawn you closer to our precious Jesus. Thank You Mzungu for taking us with you through your journey!

photo credit 

She quietly stood by my side as I was quieting a baby in the back of the church. She said no words. She had no glimpse of emotion on her face. She just stood. All she was in that moment was a fearless young girl standing next to this mzungu awaiting the chance for my hand to drop to my side so that she could grab it. Once that happens, she will be mine until she leaves this place because she doesn’t want to take the chance that another child will take the place on my lap; or, until mum calls her.

I used to think it was the great work to hold onto these kids with the desire to never let go. It was in those moments I could hold on tight while praying over them, their families, and their circumstances. I’d cherish these moments.

This moment was different though. Before I got the chance to begin to pray, before I was able to whisper something beautiful over her, Mama Scovia called little Jovan away. She looked my way with an innocent smile and waved to me. She was gone before I knew it, on her way over to Sunday school with her older sister. My moment was over. Jovan was with me for just a few minutes. We smiled together and ate a sweetie (candy) and cleaned each other’s hands with sanitizer. And just when our moment was over, as she ran over to her mum, I was reminded that the act of holding must be an act of release.

I think that’s the way of this world – the part I have trouble with. We cherish what we must somehow release.

I wanted to hold on to little Jovan forever. I want to hold on to God’s children and love His people to the best of my ability. After all, God has given me this desire, right?

I used to think it was the great work to do this, until I realized there’s a greater work—seeing it through God’s view. It’s one thing to be able to hold people secure in your arms, in your heart, and in your thoughts about them and never wanting to let that go. But the reality is that we must.

God loves us. He loves us to no end. He released His Son into a desperate world. I think about the cross, and how in that moment of Christ sacrificing Himself, He was releasing us from the embrace of the world into the embrace of God.

There’s a connection, I think, with an offering and the release.

What I mean is that if we hold these things, these moments, too tightly, we can’t make the gesture of offering. In doing this, we can’t do the greater work. The work of loving so deeply and securely that we actually release our hold on what it is that we love so much. By holding onto something too closely, we lose the opportunity to see it as a gift, which I believe actually hinders us from being able to offer praise back to the Giver.

If we hold onto something too closely, we miss the greater work of love.

“Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name.” –Hebrews 13:15

followthenicki.com Nicki in Uganda, 2013

followthenicki.com Nicki in Uganda, 2013 // There's little Jati!
read about Jati HERE 

followthenicki.com Nicki in Uganda, 2013

followthenicki.com Nicki in Uganda, 2013

FollowTheNicki.com 

and read Nicki's chronicles during her stay in Uganda

Birthday Surprise! It's Nicole. part 1

Happy Monday and welcome back to the Birthday Surprise series. Today we welcome back Nicki, or as I now call her Mzungu (white girl). Last year Nicki shared on the Birthday Series about her two week trip to Uganda ( read here part 1 and part 2). Since then, she returned to Uganda for a much longer visit and chronicled her thoughts at FollowtheNicki.com. If you're up for some serious life changing reads, go visit the links. Without further ado, scroll down for the first of three posts by our favorite Mzungu. 

photo credit

Hi everyone!

You know some things I love? Birthdays, for one, so happy 4^th birthday, blog!!  I also love getting to hang out and share some words here on Rak’s space. I love her loud, hilarious, creative and insightful heart, and it’s a joy to share here at her blog. Even better—she asked me to talk Uganda for a few posts! I’m excited by that and I pray you take away some encouragement from this week’s posts with whatever the Lord wants to share with you. So off we go…

  

May 1, 2013 I stepped on a plane bound for Entebbe, Uganda without a clue as to what God had in store for me. He knew.

Questions raged from others on whether this was where God was “really” calling me and for how long. Only He knew.

I had only previously spent two rapid weeks in Uganda less than 9 months before this time. I knew close to nothing about what culture would be like, how awkward the ever-changing weather would be, or how difficult it would be to survive on my own cooking for four months. He knew.

He knew the hardships, the bouts of loneliness, and the depths of intimacy and vulnerability that I would experience. He knew the place I had just walked through with wounds and bruises, and a slightly bleeding heart, and He knew where He needed to take me.

My God knows me. He also knows my absolute confidence when I say that my heart and my life have been utterly transformed because of this crazy leap I took to leave the familiar and cross into the unknown—alone. I am still in awe of the privilege I have been given to share life and ministry with the people of Uganda. The capacity in which I had ever previously served God was easily eclipsed by the glow of relationships birthed, the experience of working alongside churches, ministries and in homes, and the joy of seeing a lost and hurting heart being made alive in Christ.

There was a point where this role of Nicki ended and where the great and awesomeness of God began. This point was an acknowledgment that in order to truly be safe, protected, happy, secure and fully used, I needed to completely abandon myself before God, Creator and Savior. My everything was in Him. My everything is in Him. Uganda pushed me to see beyond myself, my flesh, and to witness the miraculous love of my God. His thoughts and His plans are way above mine; yours too. He knew what I needed and where I needed to go.

All along, He always knew…

photo credit: Nicki, Uganda 2013

photo credit: Nicki, Uganda 2013

photo credit: Nicki, Uganda 2013

Birthday Surprise! It's Ziemely

Happy Friday Friends! Today's post comes from my friend Zee. In short, she can be described as encouraging, a gentle and quiet spirit, and lovely. I'm bummed that I can't see her often, but between texts and prayers the Lord has united us in friendship. You will be greatly blessed through her post! 

photo credit

I want to start off by saying thank you to Raquel for allowing me to contribute to her blog. I was surprised when she asked last year and I think even more surprised this time around.

I’m from Miami but this past January I moved to Nashville. You are probably wondering why Nashville and to tell you the truth I wondered the same thing for a while. In April 2011, after a very tumultuous 2010, a year in which I lost three close loved ones and ending an unhealthy relationship I truly and whole heartedly gave my life to Christ.

Even though I was confiding and trusting in God I was still taken aback when He planted a seed for the city of Nashville. I was a baby in the faith and in all reality I still am, but I thought I was crazy! I had never been to Nashville nor did I know anyone here. But after trying to put the idea out of my mind for close to a year, I realized that if I didn’t at least start to research the city and the potential move I would be going against something that I felt God was calling me to do.

As soon as I started looking into it, I started to feel more and more at peace about the possibility of leaving my home for the unknown. I applied for 3 jobs and within a month of applying to the third job I was offered a job with my current company and I knew that I was on the path God wanted me to be on.

There are times that I am completely at a loss for words about all that has happened since giving my life to Christ. Has it been easy? NO! Have I had moments of second guessing? YES! Do I regret it? NO! And that is because I know that since that decision, God has been working in me. He is using my time here in Nashville to refine me. There are moments when it hurts and it gets lonely but I look around at all that He has blessed with me and I can’t help but be grateful for the people He has put in my life, His patience, His mercy, His love but most importantly His grace!

It has been almost  a year since accepting my job and making the decision to leave my family and friends in Miami and embark on an adventure in which I knew I was not 100% in control of and if I had to choose one word that encompassed my move it would have to be Grace! I am learning what that word truly means, I am learning to accept it but most importantly I am learning how to offer grace.

Do I have it all figured out? Not at all! Do I still make mistakes? ABSOLUTELY!! So far, my time here has been one of change. I have had my set-backs but it is in those moments in which I am learning the most. He uses those moments to show me that it’s not about me. It is about something greater than me!

May this verse hat has spoken to me more times than I can count, resonate with you. I pray that we continue to accept His grace and realize that we are weak but it is in that weakness where we are made STRONG!

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

*Last year she was a guest blogger for the Birthday Surprise series, check her last post HERE. Have a beautiful day! 

Zee's home in Nashville 

Nashville

Nashville 

Birthday Surprise! It's Monica part 2

Happy Friday! Welcome back to the Birthday Surprise series. Today Monica will be sharing with you part two of her journey in Montana and Guatemala. Be blessed!

photo credit 

When they came to the place of which God had told him, Abraham built the altar there and laid the wood in order and bound Isaac his son and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood.- Genesis 22:9

   During my experience with Ignite, the Lord opened my eyes to how big the Church really is, all the people and the work that’s going on for His Kingdom and all that’s being accomplished as well as all the souls that still needed to be shown His love and compassion. I found myself falling in love with unfamiliar people and places and being very confused as to what to do with my new found desires.

   

At first I was kind of frustrated  “ God, I had my life planned out already I was going to go to school for this many years get my diploma in this, serve you in this way, get married eventually and who knows I might even thrown in a few kids somewhere down the line, why are you changing the plans on me know? why are all of these new desires suddenly popping up, they don’t even logically match up with anything that is naturally me!” ( which looking back now, isn’t that how God usually works? Gotta Love Him for it)

   But the new desires where there none the less, the Lord grew my perspective of who He was and just what He was capable of and just how sovereign He was in my life and in everyone’s life as well, God has a plan and nothing can really stand in the way of HIs will getting accomplished.

    Half way through my time on the field, while I was translating the story of Abraham and Isaac for the Kids program curriculum down in Antigua, the Lord had me experience my own Isaac sacrificing moment. Was I really willing to offer up my Isaac to the Lord, my life, the plans I had made, all of the promises I believed the Lord had given me or the desires that I believed where God given, was I willing to give that all up if He asked me to? Or did I value the gifts more than the Giver? 

The Lord brought me through a season of doubt, events where lining up in a way that made is seem like those newfound desires in my heart were never going to happen, and it looked as if I was going to be left hopeless and shattered, and that feeling of hopelessness and panic at the thought of not having what the Lord had ( I believed) promised me left me broken. 

    Broken not at the fact that I wasn’t going to receive my desires or that I had misheard God, but Broken at the fact that I had placed my eyes on the promises and not the Promiser. My hope was not on Him who redeemed and saved me ( not to mention Loved me unconditionally) it was on His promises. The Lord used that moment to instill in me the importance of placing my hope in Him, not on the things that He can give me.  Yes the Lord provides for us, but the motivation behind my relationship with God has to be Love and gratitude not what I can get out of it. 

    I ( in my own way) tied my promises to the altar and ran a knife through it. The most interesting thing about this passage to me is that God commanded Abraham to sacrifice Isaac, but stopped him before he could run the blade through. God is not a liar, and yeah we’ve all heard it before “God was just testing Abraham to see if he would do it”, but how did God know Abraham would really plunge the knife in? How did He know Abraham wouldn’t turn the knife at the very last second? For me the answer lies in the fact that the Lord looks at the heart, and the Lord knew Abraham would sacrifice Isaac physically because he had already done it in his heart. True sacrifice happens within the confines of the heart. 

       My challenge for the duration of my time in Guatemala as well as now that I am home is making sure that when I wake up each morning I put my eyes and hope in Christ, not on anything else, because when my joy is dependent on the God who never changes ( or fails) there’s no person or circumstance that can take it away.

Guatemala 2013

Birthday Surprise! It's Monica part 1

Today's post comes from the lovely Monica. I've had the privilege of being Monica's youth leader and now friend. With great joy I asked her to share her heart and pour out what God has done in her life the past few months. I am confident that you will be blessed by her. Tune in Friday for part 2.

photo credit 

Happy Birthday Blog!

I was so honored when Raquel asked me to post on the blog for its fourth birthday.

As some of you may know this past year the Lord had me go through a program called Ignite with Potter’s Field Ministries. It’s a program designed to have students give a year of their lives completely to the Lord. I spent three months in Montana, training to be sent out along with 2 other girls to the beautiful country of Guatemala.

   I spent 6 months in Guatemala, doing afterschool work with the kids in the local community, tutoring, bible lessons, skits, puppet shows, you name it! During the last three months the training portion of the Ignite school was moved down to Guatemala and my team and I were able to come alongside the then training interns ( who are now on the field) and help encourage them during their time there.

   The Lord has used the past 10  months of my life to reveal Himself to me in such a powerful way. For so long I bought into the lie that I was unlovable, that there was something defective in me that unqualified me to be loved, even by God. While I learned multiple lessons this year, none has gone deeper that the realization I had during my 3^rd month on the field.

    God loves me. As silly and basic as that might sound , after all it’s a phrase that any three year old in Sunday school can utter, it was a truth that had not sunk in very deep in my life. For so many years I thought God loved me, but it was only because I could fit under the classification of “human” which automatically made me eligible to receive His Love, but He would never really hand pick me to love, there are so many better people out there to pour out love and favor on, so many that are worth loving He definitely wouldn’t chose me if He had the choice. 

   This sadly is the lie that I had allowed to embed itself in the depths of my heart, and it was so successfully embedded that I believed it to be true, and was completely blind to the fact that I believed it about myself and my relationship with the Lord.

   During my time on the field, I literally had nothing else to cling to but Him, no familiar background, no home church, no people that I had known forever, my robotic and semi-automatic “christianese” responses wouldn’t cut in on the field. I was forced to get raw and get real with God and allow Him to strip away all the routines that I had allowed myself to hide behind, and come face to face with the ugly truth ( that was really a lie) that had been shaping my view of God and His Love for me all this time.

    I learned what it is to be Loved by the Lord, but better yet what it is to accept His love. What it is to bask in the Steadfast Love that the Lord has for me, and in that I found a confidence in being His Daughter that I was convinced I’d never be able to have.

   I’m still learning just what it is to walk in the freedom His Love brings, His individual love for the person, not for humanity in general but I’m taking it one step at a time.

   Being back home now after such a tremendous experience is a bit disorientating, but I have the Love of my Heavenly Father to ground me. I am beyond thankful for the journey He’s guided me through and the one that’s yet to come.

   Thank you to all who have been praying for me during my trip, your prayers where definitely heard and felt. May you too bask in the Steadfast Love of the Father. 

Monica in Montana with the Ignite program

Monica's view in Montana (jealous)

Monica in Guatemala

Happy 4th Birthday

photo credit 

Hello Lovelies! Let's celebrate and jump for joy... Living As A Lily has turned the big 4! That's right, it's birthday birthmonth. Since the blogs first birthday, I take off the month of November and and invite guest writers as "Birthday Surprise" posts. I pray that each Birthday Surprise is a blessing to read and a word fitly spoke. Thank You for reading and making this blog yours as well. 

birthday surprise! It's Cindy.

Hi Friends!
I pray and hope that the birthday series has been a great blessing to you. This week I have been so encouraged by all the wonderful and wise words we have received. Today will be no different. Cindy is my younger cousin/ little sister/ friend / fellow youth leader / and at times, my daughter. The Lord has done a remarkable work in her life. With great joy, I share this post with you. God bless you.

Most of my life I lived in fear. Fear of people, fear of failure, fear of being alone- the list would go on and on. It got to the point that I would do what I feared in order to seem that nothing was wrong (I feared showing my emotions as well). All of these irrational fears that kept me from living my life were nothing compared to the rational fear that I had of losing someone that I loved. This rational fear became reality when my Mother passed away in Spring 2010, the end of my junior year in High School. 

Prior to my Mother passing away, I remember worrying about my grades, worrying about the score that I would get on my SATs, whether I would get into a good college… It all seemed so important at that time. I grew up believing that that was all that life was about: going to school, achieving a degree, getting a good job, and then starting a family. It took losing my mom to realize that there was more to life than just being successful. It took losing my mom to realize that I had a choice to have a bigger purpose in life- to follow God and the plans that He has for me. 

I gave my life completely to God three months after she passed away. I knew I couldn’t handle life and all the things going on at home on my own anymore. I realized that God would be by my side to help me get through it, as long as I put my trust in Him. Not everything has been peachy since then but God has not failed to give me support in any of the trials that I have gone through. God has been faithful to guide me along the path that He has set before me and helped me to build my trust in Him, even though it was very hard for me to trust anyone else. 

I’m sure that you can relate to me in some way. Is there any fear that you have had for a long time that you have not been able to deal with on your own? I want to tell you that you don’t have to. You have a God that is way bigger than you, a God that already knows where your life is leading, and He will be there for you as long as you give Him the chance to be.

-

“Cast your anxiety on Him for He cares for you.”

 1 Peter 5:7

-

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.”

Proverbs 3:5-7

happy birthday

Happy 2nd Birthday to this blog! 

With so many events happening, I haven't carved out the time to post on this wonderful occasion. Post coming soon. God bless you!

birthday month

I cannot believe that the 10th of this month will be a year since God placed it in my heart to start this blog journey. Wow! I am blown away.. both honored and humbled. Every week during the wonderful month of November you will be reading from a birthday guest. I am very excited to share with you a couple of the ladies that have been lilies among thorns in my life.

From day one, the vision I recieved from the Lord was to use this blog as a vessel of hope, encouragement, truth, but above all, to point others to Jesus. May the Lord continue using this home, A Lily Among Thorns, as His vessel of honor.

Dear Friends, let the birthday celebration begin!!!

Oh, give thanks to the LORD, for He is good!
For His mercy endures forever.
Let the redeemed of the LORD say so,
whom He has redeemed from the hand of the enemy,
and gathered out of the lands,
from the east and from the west,
from the north and from the south.
They wandered in the wilderness in a desolate way;
They found no city to dwell in.
Hungry and thirsty,
their soul fainted in them.
Then they cried out to the LORD in their trouble,
and He delivered them out of their distresses.
And He led them forth by the right way,
that they might go to a city for a dwelling place.
Oh, that men would give thanks to the LORD for His goodness,
and for His wonderful works to the children of men!
For He satisfies the longing soul,
and fills the hungry soul with goodness.
Psalm 107:1-9 

Merry Christmas & Lyrical Friday

It truly is the most wonderful time of the year. I have to confess that I haven't been jolly... more Scrooge-like. I didn't want to put up the Christmas tree, I wasn't able to collect my unemployement check (that meant no gifts) and to make matters worse, the "ancient of days" in the family didn't want to celebrate BIG like we usually do. But God- placed it in my brother's heart to set up the Christmas tree and all I had to do was decorate, God provided just enough money to get me through the basic gift giving (I love giving gifts) and He gathered a good chunk of my family tonight for our Christmas Eve dinner. Jesus came through for me and rescued Christmas! Ok, so yea, this is of no importance when compared to the magnitude of what happened in the town of Bethlehem. To me, it is inconceivable that God would become a baby, a human to rescue me. Happy Birthday Jesus! Thank you for being my wonderful Savior.

Today is Lyrical Friday and Oh come, oh come Emmanuel is the song I will share with you. This is probably the only Christmas song that I really enjoy. It is more than a song, it is a prayer. May the cry of your heart be "Come Emmanuel."

 (you may want to mute the music player on the side bar)

Lyrics below to follow the video

Oh come, Oh come Emmanuel
*This version is by Selah

Oh come, Oh come, Emmanuel
And ransom captive Israel
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear

Rejoice, Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, Oh Israel!

Oh come, Thou Dayspring, come and cheer
Thy people with Thine advent here;
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night
And death's dark shadows put to flight

Rejoice, Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, Oh Israel!

Oh come, Thou rod of Jesse, free
Thine own from Satan's tyranny
From depths of hell Thy people save
And give them victory o'ver the grave

Rejoice, Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, Oh Israel!
Rejoice, Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, Oh Israel!