Incorruptible Beauty

Happy Wednesday Lovelies! 

I'm writing to you from my couch, with my cup of coffee of course! If you could see me, you might gasp. I have a homemade mask on... which my brother likes to call it caca-face, I call it chocolate. But that's not what today's post is about. The mask has a little to do; but not the chocolate, though now I have chocolate on the brain! 

I recently watched a news clip about the ever changing standard of beauty. It immediately caught my attention. As a Latin/Hispanic woman I cringed watching this clip. Take a look:

“I say that inner beauty does not exist. That’s something that unpretty women invented to justify themselves.” –Osmel Sosa

I think of all the young girls, who like myself at their age, believe the lie that our worth is found in a “standard” of beauty. To say that inner beauty does not exist, is to say that your personality, character, talents, and achievements are of no value. These are all God created and given, and God is beauty. 

If 14 year old Me would have pursued the standard of beauty that I longed for, I would most likely be dead because of the Anorexia. But most importantly, I would have missed out on discovering the many wonderful truths, lessons, and people that have added worth and value to my life:

Intimately knowing the love of God

Growing in knowledge of God’s purpose(s) for my life

Learning what my God given gifts and talents are

Developing those gifts and talents for the good of others

Using my not-so-standard-of-beauty body to serve others

Using my story to help girls and women

Traveling the world for pleasure and for missions

Loving and being loved by family and friends

My less than perfect life is also a complete life. And by complete I must include those moments of fear, loss, and trials. These have each taught me a lesson that add worth and value to my life.

I can’t help but think of Peter’s words:

Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. 1 Peter 3:3-4 NLT

The New King James Version uses the words: Incorruptible Beauty

In other words, this standard of beauty is unfading, incorruptible, honorable, admirable, worthy, good, praiseworthy, estimable, wonderful, and exemplary.

I would do you a disservice if I didn’t quote Allie MarieSmith  on the definition of a woman who possesses an incorruptible beauty:

“Such a woman is at peace with her God. She trusts him completely a her number one relationship in her life. She understands where true value and worth lies- that it’s not in the clothes she wears, the guy she dates, or her socioeconomic background. She’s fully aware of her identity as a beloved daughter of God. Her spirit is at rest- gentle and quiet because she knows that no matter what trouble comes her way; her future in Christ is secure. No amount of striving, accomplishments, or external beauty can maker her more valuable or loved in the eyes of her Lord. That, my girl is a beautiful woman.” -HEAL, page 113

So here I am, with a facial mask on in an attempt to rid my face of acne. I’m also contemplating what nail polish to wear and what lipstick to buy. I’ve learned that being girly is ok, as long as my heart is in check. And though I love all things fashion, makeup, and dressing up, I love The Lord more. His standard of beauty is the one I seek and long for. 

And so I leave you Lauren Scruggs. She has a story that completely shatters Osmel Sosa and our society’s twisted ideals.

to-do list

Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. Colossians 4:5

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Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples. John 13:35

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A good word makes an anxious heart glad. Proverbs 12:25

hello march.

Hi Friends.
I am so happy to be feeling better and blogging.
I don't know who this is for, but since last week I have been wanting to share it here:

From Job 5:8-18
If I were you, I would go to God and present my case to him.
He does great things, too marvelous to understand.
He performs countless miracles.
He gives rain for the earth and water for the fields.
He gives prosperity to the poor and protects those who suffer.
He frustrates the plans of schemers so the work of their hands will not succeed.
He traps the wise in their own cleverness so their cunning schemes are thwarted.
They find it is dark in the daytime, and they grope at noon as if it were night.
He rescues the poor from the cutting words of the strong,
and rescues them from the clutches of the powerful.
And so at last the poor have hope,
and the snapping jaws of the wicked are shut.
But consider the joy of those corrected by God!
Do not despise the discipline of the Almighty when you sin.
For though he wounds, he also bandages.
He strikes, but his hands also heal.

I absolutely loved this portion of scripture. I can't get enough of it.

My Jesus does great things, He performs miracles, He gives prosperity, He protects, He rescues, He gives hope, He corrects, He bandages and He heals. My Jesus can do all of that and so much more for you. If I were you, I'd go to my God and present my case to Him :)

Happy... Monday!

First I wanted to update you on the new HEAL group. Our first meeting was this last Saturday. It was an awesome time. The girls were a blessing to have. I am very excited (as I always am) for these girls. Pray for them as the Spriti leads you. Thanks.

Last night I attended a Valentine's Day dinner. It was so much fun. Great food, fun games, lots of laughter and a hilarious movie to end the night. But one activity that we did together before dinner was my favorite part. At the dining table, each chair had a heart shaped balloon tied to it. Written on each balloon was a single verse (just the reference), each balloon was different. Before tearing our plate of yummy food apart we each looked up our verse, wrote it down on an index car and then one by one read the verse for all to hear. My verse was Psalm 89:28.

I will love him and be kind to him forever; my covenant with him will never end.

I personalize scriptures ALL the time:
"I will love Raquel and be kind to Raquel forever; my covenant with her will never end."
Now you try it: "I will love _____ and be kind to _____ forever; my with _____ will never end."

I adore how personal God is.
He will love you forever.
He will be kind to you forever.
His covenant (bond, agreement, promise, vow) with you will never end.

I know what this spoke to me. I pray that God may meet you where you are at with this verse.
God bless YOU!

disregard the dust

Hi Friends.
Please disregard the dust on my blog, lol.
I am very excited to write today. It has been a most adventurous and wonderful two weeks since my last post.

July 25-31 was our annual youth camp. God was so good to us. His presence there was so powerful and sweet. We took 140+ teenagers up to Polk City, Fl and stayed at our favorite Camp: Gamp Gilead. We studied through the book of Joshua among other topical teachings and devotionals. Chains were broken, lives were healed and eyes were opened as Christ was revealed. It truly was a beautiful time. I love the camp experience and the fire it fuels in the lives of these kids. What is even more exciting is witnessing these kids seeking the Lord and encouraging one another after they have returned to their homes, to their phones, to facebook and what not. God is on the move and UTH NATION is moving right alongside with Him. Awesome God, I worship you in wonder :D

Another recap: HEAL Group. Yesterday morning we concluded our HEAL study. Lesson 6 (Abundant Living) was the perfect ending to a wonderful study through Psalm 139. This study has been most delightful and convicting. The Lord has done a great work in my heart and in the heart of the 6 girls who boldly joined me on this journey. Never, in all my years of walking with the Lord, have I experienced God's grace like I have in the last 4 months. I had an understanding of His grace yet in that knowledge I had not experienced grace in a personal and intimate way. This study has been the tool God used and continues to use as He searches my heart and leads me in the path of everlasting. Be in prayer for the next 6 girls that will begin a wonderfully made journey this coming Sept/Oct.

Throughout the course of this week, I will be sharing with you a little more about what God has been speaking to me to speak to you. Stay tunned. But for today, He has given me a portion of scripture to share with you:

“Can a woman forget her nursing child, and not have compassion on the son of her womb? Surely they may forget, yet I will not forget you. See, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands; your walls are continually before Me." Isaiah 49:15-16

May we be a people who stand firm on these words. He has inscribed us on His palms. My name, Your name is written forever on His palms. You are loved by God. His word says that He loves you with an endless love (Jer 31). My prayer is that both you and I would not forget that. You are forgiven and dearly loved. You were, you are and will forever be worth dying for to God. 

 For I shall be glorious in the eyes of the LORD, and My God shall be My strength. Isaiah 49:5

confession: my sin, my struggle, my brokeness

He will yet fill your mouth with laughing,
And your lips with rejoicing.
Job 8:21
 

Hi good Friend. You have no idea how long I have been waiting for the right post to use this picture. I named it forgotten paradise. The aged walls, the grime, the pile of dirt, its brokenness has me captivated. In a peculiar way, I feel connected to this place. I can almost identify with its condition. I wonder how lovely this place must have been once, when it was alive, nevertheless all that remains is ruble. I saved this picture to post on a day when I felt like blogging about being redeemed, or forgotten. Yet I never considered that I would have tagged it along with a confession.

I write to you today and my soul feels like this place. I confess that I have had a divided heart. I’ve been torn by longings to give in to the desires of my flesh. Continually my mind has been out of control with urges to return to a destructive lifestyle. I don’t know how or when I let my guard down but the thought of relapsing have been occurring more often than none. Like this picture I feel like the aged walls, I am falling apart and losing this battle. Like the grime in this picture I feel that Anorexia is so deeply rooted in me that I can’t wash it away. I can’t keep sweeping this pile of dirt aside as if it will go away. The more I hide it in a corner the bigger the pile grows and harder it will be to pick up, longer it will take to clean up. I am broken, but God has promised me that a broken and contrite heart He will never despise (Psalm 51*).

I detest admitting that I am weak. Really, who actually enjoys admitting that they are weak- no one! I am so weak. I also have been blind. Today I encouraged someone, looking at them with eyes of pity and compassion. At the moment I gave them advice with a sincere heart, truly yearning that “my” advice would make a difference in their walk to freedom. It wasn’t till tonight at church when my Pastor** said two things that hit me like a ton of bricks. 1) Confrontation of sin has to be in God’s timing in order for it to be effective. 2) Our sin looks horrible on someone else. But it wasn’t till he read Matthew 7:3-4 that my hypocrisy was exposed. Verse 3 says, “And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?” That scripture was like a bucket of cold water that woke me up from my sleep. As I thought about the advice that I gave, the words came back to me and ministered to me. How could I have missed heeding the word of advice that I had given? Not only was it a word from the Lord for that person, but for myself as well.

Anorexia is without a doubt a sin that can so easily ensnare you, entrap you and bind you. My life lately has been a little unstable, with many changes. I have been feeling lonely and my world was not in my control like it had been for a while, so naturally eating was the easiest control tactic. Stop eating Raquel, gain control again. I know this makes no sense and very few will really understand. This is a struggle that I have no choice but to live with. However I can make a choice as to where I draw strength from- my strength which has proven to be weak time and time again, or I can draw my strength from God who has always proven to be a strong and mighty tower who never fails, never sleeps nor slumbers.

Tomorrow I will finally begin a book/study called HEAL: healthy eating abundant living by Allie Marie Smith (links to the book and Allie’s blog). I ordered this book about a month ago and it has been sitting on my dresser... convicting me! LOL. I have avoided opening it because I know that it means going back to step 1 in my battle against Anorexia. I am definitely in a humble place, much like this picture. I thought I was established, in good condition, pure, holy, strong yet the reality of it all is that I have a lot of changes to make, a lot of growing to do and the Lord has yet to stretch me more. My pride is hurting especially since I was so sure that I had overcome this monster. I thank God that I am not alone in this battle both in the sense that I am not the only one who struggles with this but also because I have great accountability partners (which reminds me, that I need to confess to them too, lol). I covet your prayers and thank you for reading this looooong post.

Galatians 5:1
Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage.

*Psalm 51
**Pedro Garcia