Being single can be likened to a restaurant visit. You are hungry, and when you arrive, there is a waiting list. You wait out your turn; the host/hostess takes you to your table. They lead you to believe that your waiter/waitress will be right with you. Not fully understanding just how hungry you are; they leave you alone, with a menu of deliciousness, to wait even longer. The waiter/waitress finally arrives and asks you what you would like to drink. That's when you say, "I'm ready to order." They give you that look of, "Buddy, hold your horses! One thing at a time." Despite their efforts to only serve you a beverage, you place your order. What a surprise! You have to wait and wait some more. By now your hunger pain is more like an 8.0 earthquake in your belly. Your mouth waters at the thought of food. You look unto every plate that passes you and think to yourself, "Could that be my food?" Due to your level of hunger and impatience, you somehow start to believe that yes, every plate coming out of the kitchen is yours. What a let down when they pass you by. You look around and realize that everyone else has their food. Where is your food? Will it ever come? That all changes at the sighting of your favorite person (your waiter/waitress) coming out of the kitchen, walking straight to you, plate in hand [insert slow motion, dimmed lights and Barry White singing 'You Sexy Thing']. Oh Yeah, we do believe in miracles! Your food has arrived... I'll leave you two alone.
Singleness is not the present day plague or famine; you will survive this! The cliche thing to say would be, "Enjoy your singleness." Who hasn't heard that one?! To this I say, how can anyone enjoy hunger? How can a place of loneliness and emptiness be of any good? My friends, I believe the game-changer for us is found in a new perspective.
I once heard a story that goes a little like this: There were two young brothers. One was a pessimist while the other was a bubbly optimist. The boys' Father decided that it was his job to teach each boy a lesson: to the pessimist that life has glory moments and to the optimist that life is not always perfect. The next day when the boys arrived home from school, they found presents in each of their rooms. The pessimistic brother found a new TV in his room along with a brand new Xbox 360 with the latest games. The Dad was thrilled and eagerly awaiting a reaction from his son. To the Father's surprise, his pessimistic son looked down and moped around the room. He said to him, "Son, look at the new things I bought you. Isn't life great?" The son replied, "It's nice, but all these models will soon be old models and the games will not be the latest." The Father was a bit disappointed. He then goes to the room of the optimistic son. He had placed a rather large box in the middle of his room, about 5 feet tall and filled almost to the top with manure. To his surprise, he found his son in the box scooping the manure. He asked, "What are you doing?" The son replied, "With all this manure, there must be a pony in this box." (Thank you Therese Gomez for this story)
It is all about perspective. Rather than accepting your singleness as a plague, famine, disease, curse, or what not, accept it for what it is: a gift from God. Yes, it is a gift. Every season given to us is a gift from God. Singleness is a gift. Marriage is a gift. Widowhood is a gift. And what does the Bible say about gifts? James 1:17 puts it best, "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning." Our singleness is both good and perfect. Our singleness comes from the Father. And in our good and perfect Father there is no deceitfulness. Romans 12:2 reminds us that God's will is good, acceptable, and perfect. If, like myself, you find yourself single, you can stand on the truth that God's will is good, it is acceptable, and it is perfect. I pray you understand this. Singleness is acceptable.
My challenge to you is this: pray for a new perspective. As you accept this good and perfect gift, search God's word for scriptures that will feed your hungry-single heart. Yes, I am still comparing singleness to hunger. Matthew 15:32 paints a picture of how Jesus cares for us in the single community along with oh, you know, the entire world, "Now Jesus called His disciples to Himself and said, “I have compassion on the multitude, because they have now continued with Me three days and have nothing to eat. And I do not want to send them away hungry, lest they faint on the way." I hope you get that. He 1) Has compassion for you 2) He has taken notice of your walk 3) He will feed you. May this be of encouragement to you as you wait. Accept God's gift joyfully for God cares for you, He has taken notice of what you lack and He will respond. Take courage.
Off to get my breakfast on,
The Single Lily
