From Anger to Righteousness

Anger is one of those areas that the Lord instantly healed when I surrendered my life to Him. He truly replaced anger for unspeakable joy. 

I recognize that the joy of the Lord is my strength. That’s not to say that there are times where I allow His joy to be rocked by anger and frustration. I’m a long ways away from saying I don’t struggle with anger. But it doesn’t overtake me like it used to. 

If you struggle with anger, I’d love to pray for you. I’ve been there (many times) where I can’t kick off the anger, and I replay specific conversations or scenarios over and over, and the anger just festers and eats away at me. If that anger isn’t dealt with, you’re in danger of it becoming bitterneness, and bitterness is a death to the soul. 

So, let’s deal with it today so that the righteousness God desires can be produced in our lives. . 

happy 5th birthday blogie

photo credit

I know I'm a little late in posting... actually, I've been lost lately.
Much (an not much) has happened in this past year. But I can sum it all with this one verse:

After these things the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, saying, “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward.” Genesis 15:1

 God led me to do the unexpected. Out of my very mouth unimaginable words poured forth, "I'm stepping down." Say What?!?! Who... Me...  Yes! And there I sat, in tears, knowing that these very words were not spoken by my will but by God's very Spirit.

You see, I'm not an educated person like most of my peers. I didn't go to college. I have no degree, or even an AA. And though I had no title to define me, I was defined by service and ministries.

In a very inconspicuous way, these works were idols in my life. I was going to church to serve, and without notice my attendance for God alone was less and less. Don't get me wrong, I didn't drift from God. On the contrary, my service was for Him. But I was all works and neglectful of my own heart. The words of Jesus echo loudly to me concerning Mary, "But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her." Luke 10:42.

The next day I sat in my car crying. I doubted that God had spoken through me. I was afraid that this decision was the wrong one. I feared that this decision would affect my youth girls and the various ministries I was involved in. Worst of all, was I trusting God or cowardly running? I wept bitterly. At that moment I knew I needed to hear from God. I read from Jack Hayford's YouVersion Plan, Praise In The Presence of God:

God Is Our Reward
God never demands a sacrifice for the divine pleasure of smelling its aroma or because He needs us to tickle His pride. The objective is our release—our growth.

God asked Abraham to offer Isaac. Not to exploit Abraham’s emotions or to destroy Isaac, but to take away forever Abraham’s fear that God might not have his best interest at heart. Only in worship do we draw close enough to discern God’s true nature and loving heart.

God gave Abraham no immediate monetary reward for worshiping Him, but the reward was immensely grander—God Himself! (Jack Hayford)

After these things the word of the Lord came unto Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram: I am thy shield, and thy exceeding great reward. Genesis 15:1

God was asking me that very moment to willingly offer my works. Not to exploit my emotions or to destroy these ministries but to take away forever my fear that God might not have His best interest at heart. It was in fact through this act of worship that I have been able to draw close enough to discern God's nature and loving heart. He has been my shield these past few months, my exceedingly great reward.

The sacrifice was more than just stepping down from serving at church. It meant seeking a place of refuge where He would restore, revive, and renew me. Even I can recognize that old habits don't die so easily. I prayed for God's guidance and He provided such a place. Remember, God's objective through our sacrifice is our growth. And I have been growing. That is something beautiful that can not be taken from me.

I can't put to words all that He has been revealing to me, or even what He is stirring in my heart. But I can tell you this, He is making me new. 

I have been lost with reason. I've been enjoying my reward, God himself.

Anywho, now that I have brought you up to date...CHEERS to the fifth year!

Crisis

Doug Sauder: 

Crisis is a gift that nobody registers for, for obvious reasons.  But here's something that can't be denied: Crisis reveals true character. You never know the true nature of something until it is under duress or put to some sort of test. You'll never know if your roof is solid without a thunderstorm. And you'll never know the true character of someone apart from the context of crisis, and I would encourage all church leaders to embrace that reality. Here's why:

Crisis will reveal the true character in those around you, and you really need to know where people are in regard to you. Who is for you and who is against you? Nothing clarifies that like a crisis.

Also, crisis reveals the true character in you. Let's be honest, none of us are perfect and we all need to surrender and submit areas of our heart to the Lord's transformational touch. But we need to recognize what those areas are before we can yield to Him changing them in us. Nothing reveals those blind-spots like a crisis, because it's then and there that the "true you" is seen. 

Lastly, crisis reveals the true character of the Lord. God's character is constant and never changes. But there are times when we're more dialed-in than others to His voice and His actions on our behalf. Crisis is the time when our hearts tend to be most attuned to His, and He has a perfect track record of faithfulness towards those who trust in Him."

Excerpt from an interview with Phil Cooke: HERE

Lyrical Friday - Forever

Good Friday to You!
As Christians, we dare not only celebrate the joy Easter is, but we celebrate the darkness of crucifiction. We celebrate that Christ endured humiliation, He endured stripes on His back by whips, He endured the gruesome cross, He endured the a confined and lonely grave, He endured the totality of death. We celebrate the gift of sacrifice. We celebrate true, undefiled, and, perfect love. We celebrate redemption. We celebrate freedom. We celebrate victory. We celebrate life. We celebrate a future and a hope. We celebrate joy. We celebrate laughter. We celebrate mercy. We celebrate grace.

In our celebration, we magnify He who is wholly and only worthy of all glory, all honor, all praise —Jesus! Jesus Forever!

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Forever by Kari Jobe is absolutely beautiful. And as a special treat, spoken word by Isaac Wimberley is icing on this cake. May your heart be moved to gratitude, surrender, and praise. God bless You Friend.

Forever, Kari Jobe

The moon and stars they wept
The morning sun was dead
The Savior of the world was fallen
His body on the cross
His blood poured out for us
The weight of every curse was broken

One final breath He gave
As Heaven looked away
The Son of God was laid in darkness
A battle in the grave
The war on death was waged
The power of hell forever broken

The ground began to shake
The stone was rolled away
His perfect love could not be overcome
Now death where is your sting
Our resurrected King has rendered you defeated

Forever, He is glorified
Forever, He is lifted high
Forever, He is risen
He is alive
He is alive

We sing Hallelujah x 3 The Lamb has overcome

Now after the Sabbath, as the first day of the week began to dawn, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary came to see the tomb. And behold, there was a great earthquake; for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven, and came and rolled back the stone from the door, and sat on it. His countenance was like lightning, and his clothing as white as snow. And the guards shook for fear of him, and became like dead men.

But the angel answered and said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified. He is not here; for He is risen, as He said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay. And go quickly and tell His disciples that He is risen from the dead, and indeed He is going before you into Galilee; there you will see Him. Behold, I have told you.”

So they went out quickly from the tomb with fear and great joy, and ran to bring His disciples word.

And as they went to tell His disciples, behold, Jesus met them, saying, “Rejoice!” So they came and held Him by the feet and worshiped Him. Then Jesus said to them, “Do not be afraid. Go and tell My brethren to go to Galilee, and there they will see Me.

Matthew 28:1-10

Sentence Tuesday

The only thing that ever hinders peace 

is when we refuse to surrender our troubles to God.

—Jack Hayford

Birthday Surprise. It's Denise!

Hello there. Today's guest blogger is none other than my cousin Denise. She's no stranger to the Birthday Surprise tradition, and you can read her post "Trials and Adoration" here. Denise is one of the few people that I can trust and say is a woman of her word. May her story inspire and encourage you to choose contentment over bitterness.
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[photo credit]

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Bitterness and Contentment

It was 3:30 am again. I had to be up for work in a couple of hours and my head was throbbing, I was wide awake and I was losing all hope of falling asleep again. Laying there, staring into the darkness of my bedroom, thoughts began to swim through my head, and then, the tears came, burning my tired eyes. This was starting to become a daily thing. I couldn't stand it anymore. My life had been turned upside down and it felt like it had all happened overnight. Was this really happening? Was I still dreaming? Please God, let me fall back to sleep so I can wake up and this nightmare can be over.

Except it wasn't a nightmare, it was very real. I had lost my mother, and my father was marrying a much younger woman, even younger than I. Too many things were happening around me that I could not control. And every time I thought one trial had finished, another one immediately took its place. Everything was spinning out of control and I couldn't make it stop. The truth was, I couldn't stop it, not any of it. This was my new life and I was going to have to live with it, or stay miserable, stressed out, broken and wounded. The good news is that there was a way out and I knew it. I realized that the one who saved me, the one who had been there for me through everything, was still there. My God, who loved me dearly, was waiting with His arms wide open. He would be my comfort, my strength, my sanity.

Everything happened so fast, I should have been grieving but instead I was dealing with things beyond my control. There were times when my emotions took hold of me and I could barely breathe. I realized that if I let my emotions continue to control me, I wouldn't be able to breathe again.

More than any other emotions, what took over me the most was bitterness and anger. I think what shocked me was how quickly it all had happened. I didn't understand why or how it was happening, I just wanted someone to make it stop. However, deep down, I knew that all of this would be used for God’s glory. 

I felt like I couldn't trust anyone else on this earth. My real father was my God. He loved me more than anything. Isaiah 43:1-4, became my passage during this time.

“But now, O Jacob, listen to the Lord who created you. O Israel, the one who formed you says, “Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine. When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. I gave Egypt as a ransom for your freedom; I gave Ethiopia and Seba in your place. Others were given in exchange for you. I traded their lives for yours because you are precious to me. You are honored, and I love you.” ~Isaiah 43:1-4

I have a God who loves me and I couldn’t be more content in that thought. He loves me dearly. He can get me through anything. He was more real to me than He ever had been. He did not want me to be bitter and resentful. By holding onto my emotions and feeling bitter towards those around me, I was only hurting myself. No one else was losing sleep over this except me. But most of all it was hurting my testimony. How could I show the love of Christ and be an example to others if all they saw in me was sadness and anger. This is not the way God wants me to feel. It wasn’t easy but by staying in the word of God and keeping an open relationship with Him, everything became better. He spoke to me and comforted me tremendously. I was His daughter, His princess.  I was able to sleep at night and my bitterness slowly melted away. I was able to face things I never thought I would be able to face before and I was able to come home at night and actually enjoy being there. My situation did not change but my attitude toward it did.

We need to be content in all our circumstances. They are there to mold us and make us stronger. I heard a pastor use this analogy this week, he mentioned that when he was a child, his mother would bake and she would have all the ingredients laid out on the counter. He proceeded to try each one, the sugar, the oil, the flour, etc. He said he remembers trying each ingredient one by one. Individually, they tasted horrible, they were not appetizing at all. But when his mother put the ingredients together and baked them, they were delicious. When we look at each of our circumstances individually, they seem horrible, they are not good, but when you look at your life as a whole, these are the things that have made you who you are today, they have made something good.

In the end, I learned that I need to praise God no matter what, whether I am up or down. He loves me and knows what is best for me, even if I don’t understand it. He suffered for me, more than anything I will ever go through on this earth. If there is a situation that you are in that you feel you can’t control, surrender it to God, let Him handle it. If there is a person that you need to forgive, pray for them. You will be surprised at how much your attitude and heart changes toward a person when you are asking for God to work in them. Most of all, never stop worshiping Jesus. He loves you.

“Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.” ~ Colossians 3:12-15

Lyrical Friday - Love Has Found Us

I have seen you in your sanctuary and gazed upon your power and glory. Your unfailing love is better than life itself; how I praise you! I will praise you as long as I live, lifting up my hands to you in prayer. You satisfy me more than the richest feast. I will praise you with songs of joy. Psalm 63:2-5

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Satisfy us each morning with your unfailing love, so we may sing for joy to the end of our lives. Psalm 90:14

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You open Your hand And satisfy the desire of every living thing. Psalm 145:16

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Hungry anyone? Thirsty? Weary? Burdened? Lost? Angry? Hurt? Abandoned? Lonely? Broken?
Can I get a witness? We have all experienced one of the above, if not all, at some point in our lives. It may very well be that these are not scars, but recent wounds. To all these sad states, God says, "I AM." To everything you are not, He is I AM.
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I AM says to you today:
I AM your God. I AM your savior. I AM your friend. I AM your defender. I AM your deliverer. I AM your healer. I AM your provider. I AM your lover. I AM your father. I AM your creator. I AM your restorer. I AM your comfort. I AM the One who sees you. I AM the lifter of your head. I AM the anchor of your life. I AM the light in your darkness. I AM seeking you. I AM who satisfies your every need. Remember, to everything you are not, He is I AM.
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I encourage you to listen closely to the lyrics of this song. Heck, bust out dancing and rejoicing, for the great I AM has found us! His love is better than life itself. So breathe in deep His love! Because only I AM's love can fully satisfy our souls. May He quiet you with His love and calm all your fears. May our wonderful I AM fill you afresh and a new with His Spirit and satisfy your every need. God bless you folks!
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Love Has Found Us, Bellarive

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Broken down
I've run aground
in perfect need
of You
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The life You bring
You breathe on me
for out of You comes everything
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so we breathe in deep this love
so we breathe in deep this love
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Ocean sings
Your melodies
the Composer's heart 
Indeed
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Painted skies
rest at Your feet
the earth surrenders
a masterpiece
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so we breathe in deep this love
so we breathe in deep this love
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It's so beatiful 
how only You can satisfy this heart
it's so beautiful
how only You can satisfy this heart
for You will always be the life i need
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The life You bring 
breathe on me
for out of You comes everything
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that's why 
we breathe in deep this love
we breathe in deep this love
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it's so beautiful how only You can satisfy this heart
it's so beautiful how only You can satisfy this heart
it's so beautiful how only You can satisfy this heart
it's so beautiful how only You can satisfy this heart
for You will always be
the life i need
the life i need
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we sing sing it out we sing it loud 
for love has found us

sentence tuesday

Let the past rest, but let it rest in the sweet embrace of Christ.
-Oswald Chambers

Lyrical Friday - Broken for Love's Sake

Hey Friends!
I happened to find this song while searching for the song I originally thought to use. However, God lead me to this one. As I read these lyrics my heart sunk at the reality that I am nothing like my Jesus. He was broken for love's sake, I am not. I am too selfish at times to allow God to break me and mold me back into His image. I am too distracted with the affairs of this world to be broken for love's sake. God requires a wholly surrender from us. When we come to a place of full surrender He becomes our all in all, supplier of every need, provider, savior and friend.

I pray that the lyrics of this song would be more than just words with music. May your heart be quieted and stilled as you meditate on these lyrics. May you be broken and mended by God's loving hands. May He bless you abundantly as you surrender to His love, His wonders and purposes. God bless you and happy Friday!

Broken for Love's Sake, Tricia Brock


You've come to seek and to save
Those who lost their way
So seek me or I won't be found
You've come to keep and sustain
Those whom You have made
So keep me, oh keep me now

When it gets hard, You go before me as a shield
When its too late, You come behind me and You heal
Should my heart break when loves the only way
So be it Lord, may I be broken for love's sake

I will trust and obey more and more each day
As You take Your place in me
And should I ever fail or stumble in the way
You will help me to my feet

Lyrical Friday & getting owned!

Hi Everyone!
Before we get into Lyrical Friday, I wanted to blog a little about what the Lord has been showing me. He busted me earlier this week and the only way that I can describe it (thanks to my friend Chris) is that I was totally, wholly and completely OWNED by the Lord. And let me just tell you, being owned by the Lord is a pretty sweet feeling, lol.
For those of you just joining the blog (girls from Westood Wood Christian a big welcome) here is a little history to get you up to date, and by no means do I share this lightly. The SHORT and sweet version: I battle a struggle with Anorexia, mostly fighting thoughts to not relapse. Praise be to God who leads me in triumph continually and guards my steps, only by His strength am I kept whole. I am also a self proclaimed shopaholic. I know this sounds absurd to include this in the same category of struggles, but I love to shop. I'm not too sure if it is Satan himself who sets up the sales traps or if they are amazing God sent sale opportunities... or maybe it's just me!

Everyone faces trials, times of difficulty and seasons of mourning; we all cope differently. When things spiral out of control in my life, as they have the last two weeks, the dark cloud of Anorexia comes over me and does not depart. My thoughts are quickly consumed with this self destructive, self inflicted sin. Being aware of this "cloud" and not desiring to fall in to temptation I run to my comfort zone, to my place of hiding place, no, not God but to shopping. I have noticed that I have not be a wise stewardess of GOD'S money... that's right, I just said that, God's money. I have even thanked Him for the new items of clothing I purchased and for the wonderful gifts I bought. Each item purchased felt like a great accomplishment. Allow me to explain, shopping is more than an even exchange, for me it is therapeutic in a sense. My mind is distracted from the thoughts, the pain, the trial. It feels right to shop but it is only pleasurable for a moment. Shopping is a cheap cover up but not a permanent solution. Soon after the guilt sinks in and an overwhelming feeling of failure.

This past Wednesday as I was working on my HEAL lesson I came across this, "Go to God with your needs- not guys, food, retail therapy, or anything else to fill your emotionally and spiritually." Busted! I continued and came across this one verse, and I was confronted even more with my two areas of weakness: Luke 12:23, "Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing." AHH! Say What?! I had to do a double take. A verse, just for me. God is faithful, He quickly gave me words of comfort, life and hope: Luke 12:32, "Do not fear, Raquel, for it is My good pleasure to give you the kingdom." I felt so dumb... it is so easy to not trust God and become spritually crippled. Going first to God would have been the best solution, however, I took matter into my weak hands.

It is by daily drawing near to Jesus and embracing him as the One who can put us in right standing with God the Father that we are set upon the path of authentic healing. -Allie Marie Smith

All this to say that I am utterly humbled and surrendered to Jesus- again! Thanks be to God who gives joy, hope and life abundantly after failure. That same day He gave me a scripture, a crutch to lean on, a promise to hold on to: Isaiah 40:29, "He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength." May we never shy away from experiencing the warm embrace from the God of all comforts. Let us run to Him first and always. 

Anywho, today's song is a deep cry of my heart. My prayer is that both you and I would be a people who are fully surrendered to Jesus our Lord. My prayer is that through our lives, other's would see God in His glorious splendor. Let hope arise and darkness tremble in His holy light! 


(please pause the media player on the sidebar)
With Everything, Joel Houston


VERSE I:
Open our eyes
To see the things that make Your heart cry
To be the church that You would desire
Your light to be seen

VERSE II:
Break down our pride
And all the walls we've built up inside
Our earthly crowns and all our desires
We lay at Your feet

PRE-CHORUS:
Let hope rise And darkness tremble
In Your holy light That every eye will see
Jesus our God Great and mighty to be praised

VERSE III:
God of all days
Glorious in all of Your ways
Oh the majesty the wonder and grace
In the light of Your Name

CHORUS I:
With everything With everything
We will shout for Your glory
With everything With everything
We will shout forth Your praise

CHORUS II:
Our hearts they cry
Be glorified
Be lifted high above all names
For You our King
With everything
We will shout forth Your praise

Psalm 45:1

Beautiful words stir my heart. 

I will recite a lovely poem about the king,

for my tongue is like the pen of a skillful poet.

Psalm 45:1

   

 

You are the river,

That purifies and cleanses me.

Your Spirit calms

The storm in me.

Your commands are

Melodies that provoke

My soul, my will, my all

To Surrender.

Like the wind,

You offer me breath.

You are a shattered rock,

Through the cracks

flow sacred blood

Giving me life.

Your shadow alone

Would be a save haven for me.